Moving Update

We are moved in!!!!  I really could NOT have done it without my mom's help.  I completely underestimated not only how busy Asa is now compared to 9 months ago when we moved from Florida, and I did not factor being pregnant into the equation at all.  Whereas 9 months ago Asa was not walking and played contentedly on a blanket while I packed box after box after box, now he is walking, running, and into EVERYTHING.  While I packed boxes, he unpacked boxes or made a huge mess somewhere else in the room.  Then every few boxes I'd have to stop and tidy his mess.  And then I'd have to sit down for 5-10 minutes because this baby girl is wearing me out!  I really didn't think being pregnant would affect my moving productivity or what I could physically accomplish at all.  It never entered my mind.  Boy was I wrong!  I think the fact that I'm not really showing (until maybe a week ago) aids in my forgetting that I really do have limitations because I really am pregnant!  Mom came and saved the day, playing with Asa while I packed or packing while I played with Asa, lugging things that not only should I not lift but that I physically cannot lift at this point, staying at the house while movers loaded so I could get Asa set up for a nap at the new house and Matt could unload his car of odds and ends we brought over.  She absolutely made the difference between a super stressful, frazzles, out of my mind crazy and overwhelmed move and the one we actually had that pulled together with more organization and smoothness than I could have pulled off by myself.

I also realized how INCREDIBLY gracious and merciful God was in our move from FL to OH.  AND how much I was supported by prayers of people who knew I was alone with a 10 month old and packing our house by myself.  Logistically, THAT should have felt like an impossible move, but I just kept at it day after day and it got done.  This move should have been the easier one, and it was much more difficult to pull it all together.

We had wonderful movers.  They worked really hard in the rain and went out of the way to do anything we needed.  In fact, one of them was the "extra" hand hired by another company and driver to unload our truck when it arrived in OH last June!!!  How crazy is that?!?  They were careful with everything, incredibly pleasant and respectful, and we would MORE than recommend them to anyone in this area needing movers.

We are now getting settled in.  Just about all the boxes are unpacked (again, thanks to Mom!), "homey" touches are falling into place, and we are thrilled with our new space.

I recognized through the process of this move how much owning a house when we lived in Florida gave me a false sense of security.  I felt like, "We own this place so we'll live here as long as we want to."  There was not a cognizant realization of how that could all change at any time... God can open and close doors of opportunity unexpectedly.  Renting, especially after being homeowners, has been a huge mental and emotional paradigm shift for me.  It's difficult at times that we can't make things exactly how we want them, that we are limited in our options for updates or some decorating.  Most particularly with moving back into a house but still renting, it's difficult that someone else tangibly controls whether or not we continue to live here.  The owner is open to renewing our lease at the end of our one year term, but he could change his mind between now and then and decide he wants to try and sell again.  I am confronted in a very in-my-face way with the fact that I do NOT control where I live.  NO house on this Earth is my home.  I need to live with my eyes and heart settled somewhere else.  At the same time, God has given me peace to enjoy where we are living now.  I am praying it works out for us and for our landlord for us to stay here as long as Matt is working here, but even if not I know God will provide.  And in the meantime I am determined to make this home for our family and friends.  I am not under a shadow of  feeling or fearing how temporary it could be.  I realize that, but I now also realize NO place we live is a guaranteed long term abode.  And that's okay.  I'm with my family and we're walking with God... owning a house, renting a house, or renting a 1970s townhouse. ;)  That's what really matters.

Great is Thy Faithfulness

Matt and I have been talking a lot about God's provision during/after our move lately.  Asa and I have officially been here 6 months (plus a few days... Dec. 1 marked six months), and I feel like I'm having another wave of processing.  I think part of it has to do with Advent and Christmas.  I'm honestly struggling a little bit being excited about Christmas because everything feels so different.  It doesn't feel like there are the same holiday rhythms we found and established the last 5 Christmases we had in Florida, 4 of which were in the house we owned.  I had figured out where I best liked our various decorations... the kitchen had a kind of snowman theme, I knew the perfect places for our fiber-optic snowman (that I can't find... it's buried in the basement somewhere) and Christmas duck, I had everything "just so," and I'm really missing that right now.  We have many fewer rooms and much less living space, so on top of not having the tradition of putting certain things certain places that I liked, I'm having to pick and choose which decorations to use.  I could never use everything we have in the house we're renting.  It makes me sad. :(  I've had moments I felt like, "If we didn't have Asa, I would consider just doing a tree," but even THAT has been difficult!  So far we've only found spray painted trees!  No thank you!

So that being said, Matt and I have been talking about how much we cling to God's past faithfulness.  Almost in a way that speaks to us thinking we are responsible for keeping the blessing going.  Matt said one of the sermons I missed while I was in TN was about God's faithfulness to the Israelites when they were in the desert.  How God provided mana, and they thought they needed to collect and store it instead of trusting Him to provide exactly what they needed when they needed it.  We both commented that our hearts' first reaction is to do the same thing.  I GRIEVED leaving our pediatrician in Florida.  She truly was a God-send, and I cannot imagine her handling the issues for diagnosing and treating Asa's tongue tie more perfectly.  And yet, instead of trusting God to provide someone just as amazing and just as much of a perfect fit for our family's approach to medicine here in Ohio, I grieved leaving Dr. K and felt hopeless at times about ever finding a doctor I could like as much.  Why?  When God provides for us perfectly, why do we not SEE that faithfulness and trust and know He can only be true to Himself and will be faithful again?  His faithfulness does not always look the way I want it to, but He IS faithful.  I can rest in that.  I do not have to scramble and analyze and make a perfect pediatrician appear out of thin air.  I can pray and trust and follow.  And in fact, He did provide a pediatrician I really like so far. :)

Maybe I'm just rambling, but I wanted to share what God has shown us recently.  And in light of it, I have pulled some Christmas decorations out, put up a wreath and garland, and I'm not giving up on finding a tree. :)  God gave us sweet Christmas celebrations in Florida, and I know He can do the same in Ohio.  We're celebrating His greatest gift of all, so how can we not find some sweetness even in the middle of missing our FL traditions? :)  And we are both yearning for our hearts to enjoy blessing and rest in God's provision instead of scheming a way to maintain God's blessing on our own.  It's pretty ridiculous when you realize how you really process things on your own.  Praise God for His patience, grace, and mercy! :)

Encouragement for Moms

This is winding its way through blogs and FB, but in case you haven't seen it, I wanted to pass along the encouragement! :)